Microsft Cars

At a recent COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 miles to the gallon."    in response to Bill’s Comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the folowing characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason and you would just accept this, restart and drive on
4. Occasionlly, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn, would cause yor car to shut down and refuse to restat, in which case you would have to reinstall the engin.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT." But then you would have to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would only run on five per cent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning light would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.
8. New seats would force everone to have the same size butt.
9. The air bag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.
10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let yo in untill you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they they neither need or want them.   Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the cars performance to deminish by 50% or more.   Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
12. Everytime GM introduded a new model car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You’d press the "start" button to shut off the engin.

About brentwoodprop

Just loving life, carrying my camera and searching for beauty!
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5 Responses to Microsft Cars

  1. Magenta says:

    This is hilarious and how true!!!  
    I found your comments about the river of life running through the generations of a family very moving. I was going to delete my post as I was experiencing the dark side of life when I wrote it, but the comments I have been getting are thought provoking. I

  2. Tani says:

    Cute entry,would make a great emai to send around.I just popped in to see how the allotment was going.Everything is coming up daylilies at my garden right now,I can barely keep up with the picture taking,LOlHope to see ya around.

  3. Magick says:

    Hiya Susan:  I love this blog….#9 is my favourite.  I also looked at the pics of the Donkey Derby.  What a fun idea.  You have one every year??  Is that you sitting on the motorcycle??
    I like to think that all of my wrinkles come from smiling…that makes them seem prettier….lol.

  4. Marie says:

    LOL!!  I enjoyed reading this not that I agree with all the allegories that GM made. Hugs, Marie

  5. Magenta says:

    I was blog walking this morning and just stopped to say hello.

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